Sorry for the long one! But I think it is worth the read!
I was saved by Jesus in June 2008. Unbeknownst to me I had started working with a Christian in my job as a community nurse for a few months. On initially finding out, I thought he just went to church for a bit of social interaction and child care, then I realised his faith was real. This shocked me, as I tended to think at that point that no-one really believed any more.
God was working in my life without me even realising it, I was a big drinker and pretty messed up in a lot of ways despite having a good reputation as a nurse and being able to cover up my problems quite well. I was always looking for the next fix, like so many people, the next thing to make me whole, to make me better and used drinking to run away from my problems and the world and hide.
I suddenly became aware of my sin, I became aware of stuff I had done wrong, I became aware that I was wrong in so so many ways but didn’t know what to do about it (and this was without the Christian even saying much to me about it, God was working). I became bothered by traumatic events from years ago and went to a counsellor. Then, my friend invited me to his baby daughter’s dedication at my now current church. It is a charismatic Christian church with a good family vibe and God’s presence amongst us.
When I walked in I was terrified, I felt like people could see into my soul and see the dirt, but also, I could sense something in the room that I didn’t understand. I now know it was God’s presence, people were raising their hands in worship and I cried all the way through the service. I went away and wanted to return but was frightened. I was then invited back a few weeks later, kept on going for a few weeks, then I was given a Why Jesus? booklet. I went home and curled up in bed feeling very, very low and lonely, then I kept hearing the words of a worship song over and over again – “God stepped down and lifted me up” over and over again, kept trying to remember the rest of the words and couldn’t, then decided to read the booklet and ended up praying to Jesus and rose out of bed feeling so high it was unreal. I asked my friends what had happened and they said if you meant it, then you’re a Christian.
I was so happy, I was accepted and forgiven and just lighter, I bounced around for weeks. Then came a bit of a pruning session, where things started getting sorted out, and that is ongoing. But Jesus healed me of the need to drink and smoke, He made my mind clear, He healed me of past trauma and self consciousness, He makes the whole world brighter and joyeous. He died in my place, returned me to Eden, gave me the reason for living. Jesus saved me.
“If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” – Romans 10:9 (New International Version)
If you want to know this for yourself. Please message me or pray this prayer and message me. But please do know, there is nothing you can do to make God love you any less. This is for all.
Also, please know, this does not make me think I’m perfect, I am far far from it. I make mistakes (I am terrible for yelling) and I still sin, in fact this is why I actually need Jesus. As he says Himself, the well do not need a doctor, but the sick do. God restores us and gives us a hope and a future. Please ask Him if he is there and what He has for you if you don’t yet know Him.
Lord Jesus Christ,
I am sorry for the things I have done wrong in my
life (take a few moments to ask his forgiveness for
anything in particular).
Please forgive me. I now turn from everything that
I know is wrong.
Thank you that you died on the cross for me so
that I could be forgiven and set free.
Thank you that you offer me forgiveness and the
gift of your Spirit. I now receive that gift.
Please come into my life by your Holy Spirit to be
with me forever.
Thank you, Lord Jesus. Amen.