My head is spinning…

Isn’t it busy on social media and the news recently, so much going on, so many opinions?! The good, the bad and the mediocre, so many theories, so much hatred coming out from so many places too. I’m sure there is love too, but a lot of stuff I’ve seen is very negative. My head is literally spinning, perhaps a fast is in order….

In saying this I don’t mean to denigrate things that have happened, there are terrible things that have happened, it’s just all the opinions that make me spin..

I was thinking a bit last night on honesty and just being us, who God made us to be. Mainly about the typical ‘how are you?’ ‘fine thankyou’ type response that most of us seem to do all the time. What is that???!!! Why do we feel like we can’t just say it as it is at the time before everything builds up to boiling point. It would probably be healthier. Of course, I’m talking about myself too. This thought actually came from a couple of interactions I had. Of course there’s healthy and unhealthy conversations, people to trust, people not to trust, dependent on what exactly it is, but when did this ‘front’ become expected? or is it just me that feels like that?

I am not a robot. I am a human. So are you if you are reading this…. We can tell God anything, but the bible also tells us to confess things to one another too and be part of a group. I don’t think I’m mistaken on that. So when are we going to actually do that in a healthy manner? are we? Am I?

I’ve just been reading the beatitudes, chapter 5, verse 4 says: Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted”.

I don’t think we follow this very much of the time (as Christians), there seems to be an expectation quite often (in the protestant bit anyway) of pull yourself together, get with God, capture your thoughts, you’ll be fine. Why are you acting like that?

If you think I’m wrong, that’s fine, it’s how I’m feeling. Yes we need to read God’s word and believe what He says, but it is fine and good to mourn and weep and lament, often for a time. I believe that if we don’t do it when we need to, it then becomes unhealthy and closed off.

I still miss my dad so, so much. I miss a lot of things.

I weep for him, I wish he was still here, I wish I knew where he was, but I don’t. But God does. I will trust Him on that one and I will pray for my dad and my family. But let people mourn, there are many reasons for mourning. Let them mourn and just direct them to the ultimate comforter. Don’t make them feel as if they shouldn’t, I find non verbal disapproval in particular is rife…

This is not personal to anyone in particular, it’s a general feeling I often get and I wanted to get it off my chest. Don’t be uncomfortable with those who mourn, don’t says ‘but isn’t it great that……..’ or things like that, just love them, be with them, let them mourn, let them cry without getting in their face let them just be. Trust God with them.

(I’m not sharing this on facebook, I don’t want the exposure on there for this one, so much for being vulnerable, Twitter’s fine, hardly anyone reads it off Twitter anyway :))


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A Jesus follower who with her family are attempting (probably comically) to start a different type of life in a totally different place, but starting where we are and rolling with it and seeking God all the way, well trying to... #theshepherdsadventure

2 thoughts on “My head is spinning…”

  1. Hi Cathy,
    I think it’s great that you can pour your heart out the way you and I love reading it! What you are saying about mourning and grieving is so very true and different people mourn in different ways. My parents have been gone for more than 15 years and yet every once in a while, I just want them near and I mourn that thay aren’t, that I can’t hug them or speak to them etc. I still speak to my Mum especially (don’t laugh) sometimes as though she can hear me, knowing that she loved the Lord and hoping that she can hear me as I still miss her very much. Most of the time I am in a good place but occassionally, something happens and I just want my Mum or my Dad.
    I have decided that it’s okay to feel that way and I don’t care what others think but I know I can lean on God for support and that He understands.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Wow. Thankyou so much. This was a bit of a nail biter after writing, probably for silly reasons really. It is ok to feel that way and that’s what I’m still learning really. That was just such a great reply to get. So much love to you and thanks for being there. There’s no way I’d laugh at you talking to your mum, I’ve been reconsidering a lot of stuff recently, not Jesus (in case that worries you) but some other things. I’ve come to the conclusion that life with God isn’t always as clear cut as I’ve thought in the past. That there are great mysteries and that is good. xx


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