I’ve come off facebook for lent, mainly as I knew it was getting to be a bit of a problem with how often I log on and scroll and a distraction and a bad habit… but I’ve still been surprised at the effect coming off it has had really. I find myself wanting to log on, but I also find myself hating it, because to be quite honest, it does not do much for me in terms of producing good things. It puts me on edge, it makes me uptight, I find myself checking it over and over and over again, scrolling for absolutely no good reason and it’s very easy for me to react to things without thinking as well, none of which is good. So I think it’s good to have a rest for a bit.
It’s the ultimate comparing yourself to others type site really (almost without realising). and that drags you down. I’m not who I should be or doing what I should be if I’m getting distracted all the time and I think it is one of the ultimate distractions.. I’ve also realised that I’d quite like proper friendships and relationships and again, not often to be had on facebook. It’s a deceptive place, with it’s ease of commenting (or not commenting)/reacting and likes and loves and hates and hugs and sad faces and algorithms and friending and unfriending and reading things into things and blah, blah, blah…… I think I probably will go back on at Easter but not as much, I’m not quite sure how I’ll actually do that yet, but I’m sure it will come clear.
I really like blogging and I also really like not seeing the facebook reactions in a way, it’s good for me, for a while anyway. Hello to people who do react though and thankyou! (this isn’t meant to be insulting towards you, it’s more about me). I’ve thought about stopping everything for a bit, but the blog stays.
Again though, it’s funny (but not really), I came off facebook and then immediately went overboard on Instagram, I then stopped Instagram too and then went onto Twitter (I don’t really post much on Twitter, just blog links), now I’m stopping scrolling Twitter too. I stop one and start to compensate with another. YouTube is a different matter, I’m still thinking that one through. I’m rapidly coming to the conclusion that scrolling though social media and seeing whole heaps of opinions is bad for me (and my family).
The personal stuff that we see on Facebook relating to people we know and love is really lovely and I also love posting things for people back home who can’t see us at all at the moment, partly because we live away and partly because of the pandemic, but for the nice stuff, there’s a whole heap of the nasties and distractions to occupy my mind and thoughts when there’s no need for it.
And no, I’m not having a meltdown 😀 or a breakdown, cutting my hair off and isolating myself, it’s anything but that really. I’ve just decided like I mentioned earlier, I’d quite like some proper relationships, not just facebook ones. I’d like to go outside or do things without thinking about posting, just be outside. Also, really, really need some space to be with Jesus. Just to be with Him and also to read my bible, I have bouts of reading and then bouts where I don’t, mainly, again, because I get distracted. Also, my eyesight isn’t as good as it was a year ago, so I’m reading via an app mainly at the moment aaaaaaagh, growing older…! so hello to YouVersion friends too :D. (I prefer the paper version.)
I’m still thinking about this and surrendering it to God, I sort of think it shouldn’t really be a big deal all this and if it is, what does that say? I also don’t want my kids completely obsessed and on phones constantly when they get older…so yes…surrendering.
Good bye for now.